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Staying married for the kids? That’s not always the best idea

On Behalf of | Aug 19, 2021 | Divorce |

Many parents who start to consider divorce as an option wonder if it will have a negative impact on their children. While it is true that a divorce can have a negative impact on your children, it’s also possible that your marriage could negatively influence them.

Being married isn’t always what’s best for your children. Think about it this way: If your parents are always arguing and fighting, nitpicking or complaining, is that really a positive environment? Living in a toxic environment can be harmful to children, so in those cases, divorcing can be a positive solution.

Toxic home environments are not healthy for children

It is widely understood that there is a significant negative impact on children when there is parental conflict in the home. It is more likely that this conflict will cause damage when it is:

  • About the child
  • Unresolved
  • Aggressive
  • Heated with insults or screaming
  • Regular/frequent
  • Results in the “silent treatment”

Although parents may think that it’s better to put up with not liking one another or trying to get through conflicts without divorcing despite the discord it causes in the home, that isn’t always the best path forward.

When parents keep their children in a conflicted environment, it causes real harm to the parent-child bond. An unhappy marriage makes tension much worse in the home, and this can hurt the way your child interacts with you or your spouse. They may become fearful of a parent reacting negatively to them, or they may simply not get the attention they need.

Psychological and behavioral problems are more likely for children living in a toxic environment. Marital conflicts may lead to psychological issues such as anxiety or depression even in young children. Other behavioral changes, such as arguing with their parents or becoming aggressive, can be signs that the conflict is starting to affect a child.

Divorce is an option

Divorce is a possible solution if your children are struggling due to your toxic marriage. It is reasonable to look for a way to stabilize your situation and to remove conflict from your children’s daily lives so that they can grow up with greater security.